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Funny Quotes from Kids

Funny Quotes from Kids

It’s true – kids really “do say the darndest things” sometimes. And members of our blog team can certainly attest to that! We recently spent time swapping stories about the funniest things the bloggers’ kids have been saying lately. Below are some of our favorite funny quotes from kids.

What funny things have your kids said? Add your own stories in the comments area below.

Boy laughing

The Funniest Thing My Child Has Said Recently…

Amy:

Owen (age 3): Mommy, you be a dinosaur.
Me: RRRRROAR! (Insert stomping feet)
Owen: Dinosaurs don’t walk.
Me: Sure they do. They can run too.
Owen: No, they don’t.
Me: Sometimes they have to run to the store, you know, to buy milk.
Owen: Dinosaurs don’t drink milk.
Me: Well, what do they eat?
Owen: (Long pause) Popcorn
Me: Maybe they have to run to the store to get popcorn.
Owen: No, they get it at the circus.

So, there you have it, proof you can never win a debate with a 3-year-old boy.

Allison:

Over the winter, my daughter, in all seriousness, asked me if I could have a baby so she would have a little sister to be able to reverse winter and take all the snow and ice away. Although I wish getting the snow away was that easy, she may be waiting a couple more winters before that happens! Safe to say she has watched Frozen one too many times!

Media Mom:

Benjamin: Why is Nana your Mommy?
Me: She just is. Just like I’m your Mommy.
Benjamin: Who is your Daddy?
Me: Well, he would be your Grandpa, but he isn’t alive anymore.
Benjamin: Why?
Me: He’s just not around.
Benjamin: Why is he not around? What shape is he?

Heather:

At a consignment shop, my daughter picked up a rotary phone. “What’s this thing?” (long pause) “Oh, I know, I saw one of these on the Peanuts once.”

Ruth:

Dalhia, age 2: She recently found her swimsuit in her dresser. She brought it out to her Mom and said, “Mom we need to go pooling.”

Noelia, now age 5 but she said this when she was three: Back story…she couldn’t remember the name of the iPad but she really wanted to use it. So she said, “Grandma, can I use your iPatio?” We still call our iPads iPatios.

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4 comments

  1. Burcu Patel August 31, 2015 at 11:12 pm

    Me: Tanay can you bring the water bottle from our room.
    Tanay (my son, 3,5 years old): No
    Me : but I thought you would be happy by helping me.
    Tanay: mummyyyy I am already happy (he replied with a cute smile to show he is really already happy)

  2. Karri October 12, 2015 at 12:02 pm

    My then 6 yo son (now19) was in the backseat while my mom (cute grandma-another story) was driving. He was listing out loud things is and isn’t afraid of “I’m not afraid of the dark, I’m not afraid of dogs, I’m not afraid of broccoli….. Well maybe I am a little afraid of broccoli”. We had a stand off one night for 4 hours because he wouldn’t eat the broccoli lol.

    My son at about the age of 3 or 4 started calling my mom cute grandma instead of just grandma. When we asked him why he said it was so they would know who he is talking to. They being my mom “grandma” and my grandma who would be his great grandma. It was so cute the name stuck and now she is cute grandma .

  3. Jennifer October 28, 2015 at 12:52 pm

    Emmanuel, age 4,always loved watching Cops and Houston SWAT… (now 17)
    He was outside with a flashlight right as it was getting dark, our neighbor is coming home from work and asks, Whatcha doin buddy? Without missing a beat he.very seriously replies LOOKING FOR EVIDENCE! YOU KNOW, BLOOD, HAIR, FIBERS…

    He is currently about to receive his Basic EMT certification! Invest in their interests! 😉

  4. Jennifer G Robertson October 28, 2015 at 1:01 pm

    My oldest child,Emmanuel, at age 4,always loved watching Cops and Houston SWAT and could perfectly recite the Miranda rights… (he’s now almost 18) was outside with a flashlight right as it was getting dark, our neighbor walks past going home from work and asks, Whatcha doin’, buddy? Without missing a beat, my son,very seriously replies LOOKING FOR EVIDENCE! YOU KNOW, BLOOD, HAIR, FIBERS…

    He is currently about to receive his Basic EMT certification! Invest in their early interests 😉 he has already planned out a military career that will help him get that SWAT position.

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