The term BFF – Best Friends Forever – and used primarily by young girls — sounds so full of love and hope and optimism about the future. And yet to me, it always seems to scream of a blissful naiveté – those poor girls have no idea of what’s to come in the complex world of adolescent and then adult relationships. I myself moved three times before I was 6 years old, and have no regular friendships that stretch back beyond high school. I can’t even remember the names of more than one or two kids I went to elementary school with. But ever since my daughter started at Bright Horizons, I myself have been indulging in the BFF fantasy.
She has two friends, one girl and one boy, with whom she is so close that everyone knows they go together — three peas in a pod, three musketeers. They were in the same infant room together and are in the same toddler class. They shriek with glee when they unexpectedly find each other on the sidewalk on the way into school; they talk about each other constantly; they find instant comfort in one another when they meet in a new or strange place for a playdate or birthday party. I’ve had the fantasy of my daughter and her little boy friend walking down the aisle together, their other friend as Maid of Honor. How nice that I already know and really like his parents, and hers too. It will make for such wonderful Thanksgivings once we’re all adults. But my dreams are crushed when I realize we live in three different towns and our little ones won’t go to school together. They’ll probably forget all about each other by the first grade and I’ll have to mourn the loss of the friendship all by myself. But I just met a dad whose daughter went to a Bright Horizons center near his wife’s office. He told me that his daughter made such good friends there, that they moved to that town to be closer to her friends (and theirs) and now, at the ripe old age of 6, she’s still BFFs with her Bright Horizons buddies. I love our town so do you think I can get the others to move? After all , it is a buyer’s market!